This year alone, I attended five funerals. All of them were for family members:  an uncle, age 62; an aunt, age 57; a brother-in-law, age 54; and two cousins-in-law, ages 54 and 45. Their deaths resulted from heart attacks, stroke, drowning, and one, allegedly, natural causes in the bathroom of a greyhound bus. The reactions I noticed expressed consistently by the bereaved, other than surprise, is regret. When loved ones pass away, people wish they had the opportunity to have said and done more. Hence, I was inspired to compose the following poem, “By Surprise”:

Death often takes us by surprise.
Too soon, we must say our goodbyes.
The sudden passing of loved ones
Results in us feeling undone.

Thinking of all we failed to do,
We question, “Is this really true?”
Regret rises within our minds:
“If only more time I could find.”

We know this is only a wish.
Life has halted to a finish.
We then struggle to come to term
With the sad truth remaining firm.

Only God now offers us peace.
This burden, we have to release.
Although it hurts, we must let go--
Forgive ourselves of debts we owe.

We can avoid this hard process
If our shortcomings, we address.
Let’s change our ways before too late.
“I love you”—pause and demonstrate.

Perform your noble deeds today.
For tomorrow, fail to delay.
While able, your best strive to give.
Who knows how long we have to live?

Visit while you have a chance.
Why postpone for some circumstance?
Call, text, email, or write letters.
These gestures make you feel better.

When your family’s or your friend’s
Existence arrive at an end,
Your aching heart may rest content--
You expressed your sentiments.

© 2011 Sylvia Green Chatman